all dressed up, nowhere to go . . .

Scared yet?

Halloween is nearly upon us, people! Dispite my attempts to be on top of shit this year, I am once again clutching at costume straws. My most excellent Roller Derby Girl outfit is proving more challenging than I anticipated -- and that's ignoring the minor detail of my not knowing how to skate. So now it's time to come up with a Plan B -- but I'll be damned if I'm going to the Garment District this week. I'm a weird girl, I must have some wacky, costume-worthy shit around the house, right? Let's see . . .


Ok, this is what I managed to gather from my "dressing table":



Hmmm . . . how about a "fuzzy beast" costume?


(I actually bought this wolf hat to wear this winter. It's really warm. Also, I don't have to go into an office anymore . . . so I am a little out of touch with how "normal" people dress. Don't judge.)


Or maybe "Flapper of the Night"?


(This headdress was my great-grandma's from the 1930's, the fan was a gift from Julia's travels.)


"Washed Up Devil"? or "The Octomom's Oldest Child"?

(Yawn, I know. Horns came from Canobie Lake - they also light up. Badass!)


"Grizzly Sea Captain":

With Mermaid:


(Captain's Hat was picked up in Florida, the paper-mache mermaid was inherited from Mama G. Yarrrr!)



"Everyone's Favorite Revolutionary War Hero, Sam Adams":


Or, I could throw a sheet over my head and go as "The Spirit of the Revolution":

I'd have to be a taupe colored ghost, though.
(Tri-corn hat was a 4th of July accessory. Because I need hats for every holiday.)



Along the same vein, I could also be "The Spirit of New Orleans":

(Mask was a NOLA souvenir from Papa G, voodoo doll was also a NOLA gift from Julia.)



I seem to have small collection of these hats of the 1940's/1950's . . . perhaps I could be "Jackie O's Personal Secretary" or "An Extra on Mad Men" . . . or "Grandma, 1952":


(Both hats were, in fact, inherited from my grandma.)



Oh man . . . so many choices! Any further suggestions of stuff I can make with this rag-tag pile of weird hats?

No wonder I love Halloween. If this accessory collection is any indication, every freakin' day is like Halloween over here! It's true - I don't like to take myself or my fashion too seriously. Life's too short, people. Put on a wacky hat and go to the grocery store.

Actually . . . maybe I could wear one of these hats, some slippers, and a stained velour sweatsuit and go as "Crazy Woman in the Canned Food Aisle of Shaw's".

I like it.